Absent valentine's vacation

I was driving back home from downtown after just found out that the traffic court no longer holding the appealing hearing at night. The rain falls heavily on my windshield.

I think to myself, how many nights have I been through bad weathers in order to visit her in almost three years? I think she wondered about this sometimes while we were still together and she drove too. It seems that while we were doing the long driving, our hearts became hardened and fragmented and falled out piece by piece.... I remember the first time feeling terrorized is on the way from Michigan back to Cleveland. Chased by a thunderstorm, I was driving at night. It feels like death was just outside the car because the rain is so heavy that I cannot see anything. When there was a thunder, the brightness reversed the darkness into the over-bright blindness. I was trying to survive in between...

Stop in front of the traffic light. I found the cafe at the corner is the first one we had breakfast together when we first visited the Bloomfield area. There is a French window on the front. I seem to see two of us still sitting there, smelling the greasy bacon and sipping the coffee.

I know you have gone far away. I think I am under the shadow longer than I expected and wanted. But you know, this is my pattern after leaving a relationship. Otherwise, you will probably still be here with me.

Cheers. This valentine's day you are probably in another's arms and enjoy wine and cheese tasting as you always like. I am closing this shadow behind me. I am closing...